Battle of Blankenship Road

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Wed, Jul 4, 2012 at 9:29 PM
From: xxxx451@aol.com <xxxx451@aol.com>
To: adamshafer@gmail.com

Before I give a play by play of the shooting,, I wont to see if this a good address

Dad

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Wed, Jul 4, 2012 at 9:31 PM
From: Adam Shafer <adam@adamshafer.com>
To: xxxx451@aol.com

Good address.

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Wed, Jul 4, 2012 at 9:50 PM
From: xxxx451@aol.com <xxxx451@aol.com>
To: Adamshafer@gmail.com

It has began. Shelling is coming in from the north. Some from the east and the south. Nothing from the west. I guess the mormons are behaving this election year. I don’t know who is attacking from the north but from the east it must be the Louisiana heathings. The gators will be at our door steps before midnight. Maybe our new dog can hold them off before she makes friends with them and turns on us. Lord have mercy on her soul and God bless America. Got to go and load the BBgun or did I break it on Pewe for rooting up the yard. Damm I’m unprotected. This may be the end. Tell Adalyn that I said hey with my last breath. Actually my last breath will probably be–Those como bastards set my roof on fire.

Love and kisses
Paw

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Wed, Jul 4, 2012 at 10:46 PM
From: xxxx451@aol.com <xxxx451@aol.com>
To: Adamshafer@gmail.com

Adam

It is 10pm and the attacks from the north is closer and more intense. There is a fierce battle on blankenship road. I can not tell if it is incoming fire or someone on blankenship has blown up their house trying to counter attack.

The explosions from the south has moved to the west towards mormon territory. I don’t know if they are fighting back or not but I did see a car go by with a dog strapped to roof of the car yelling Mitt to the rescue and remember the Texla.

I checked on my dog and she is hunkered down in the garage with her paws over her face. Now I’m wondering if she was sent here to spy on us. Your mom is doing a good job of not giving out any of our top secret war policy information.

It’s now 10:30 and shelling has stopped. Either we surrendered or the enemy has ran out of ammo. Those bastards will have to pry this computer out of my dead hands. That reminds me, Do you think that Charleston Heston will join our side. His fightin days are probbably over.

Hugs and kisses
Paw

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Thu, Oct 3, 2013 at 3:43 PM
From: Adam Shafer <adam@adamshafer.com>
To: xxxx451@aol.com
Paw,

I realize that it has now been some time since this battle, but I can certainly see that the war is raging on. I know this because the Mormons are still driving around with dogs strapped to their cars, still shouting their support for Mitt and keeping thoughts on Texla.

Did you ever come up with any concrete evidence about whether or not your dog was sent as a spy? I certainly had my suspicions all along, but did not want to offend anyone by saying so. That would be a brilliant move by the opposition, to send a dog as intelligent as yours to collect your information. I once had a dog named Baxter for nearly 10 years before discovering that he was a spy. Can you believe that he could speak Spanish, and once even ate an entire wheel of cheese? Thankfully, I got into an argument with a biker one day on a bridge, and the man punted Baxter right over the railing. Good riddance.

Stay classy, Blankenship Road.

Adam